A Future Teacher

I walk into the college room, where the seats go up and back so that all the students who were intrigued enough by the fliers that my colleague and I had hung up all over, now loomed above me. Under one arm a very large and heavy alter-fitted Holy Bible. And in my other hand, a large cloth briefcase. I place the briefcase on the ground behind the table at the head of the class room. I pick up the bible from under my arm and seem intrigued with it for a moment. I flick open some pages and seem to be reading. Suddenly I shut it and slam it -hard- onto the table top. Its loud crash making everyone go silent in the wake of its echo. Just as the echo subsides, I shout "Wake up!"

I pull out my briefcase and set out common everyday objects. A portable cd player, a portable DVD player, a cell phone, a few DVDs and CDs and a little television, as well as a few random books. I place these upon the table and put the bible under my arm again.

"This is your mind, right here," I wave my arms above the tabletop "full of materialistic and technological things. It is completely devoid of spiritual attachment to what’s really out there. Now before you religious people speak out, lemme show you your minds.

I remove a bunch of objects and place them on the tabletop along with the other things. These new objects are a few religious icons, crucifixes, chalices, pictures, and the large bible.

"Here," I wave my arms again over the desktop. "Are your minds... still, full of palpable, things you can see and hold. "

"But here’s something that will come as a shock to all of you. You do not need your cell phone." I shove it off the desk. "You do not need your television." And I shove this off the desk "You do not need your DVDs or walkman." I pick them up, examine them a moment and toss them behind me. "And you certainly do not need these: icons" I begin pushing one item at a time off the table as I say what it is. "And scriptures" I throw the book somewhere to the side. "That tell you completely superfluous things. All of these things change with perspective, every, single, one of them. This..." I spread my arms out over the tabletop one last time. "Is all every living creature on this planet needs, and it’s the one thing that binds us to all things living. Both past, present and future. You don’t think that the dinosaurs went to school and jammed out to Godsmack do you? Or that they went home to their favorite TV show and their boyfriend or girlfriend calling them."

"Everything is tainted by perspective, time, and translation, but mostly by perspective. Let me prove this to you very quickly and easily." I walk over and pick up the bible on the floor, propping it against my stomach. I open it to Genesis 1:1

"Genesis 1:1.... ‘In the beginning there was the word... and the word was God.’ See, in the original Aramaic form of the bible the word ‘God’ was actually 'yaweh' or 'jahova' meaning 'light' or 'love'. Now, having this bit of information in your head, let me read this again as it was truly intended. ‘In the beginning there was the word, and the word was Love.’ AT THIS POINT YOU CAN BASICALLY PUT IT DOWN!!!!"

Jesus The Carrot (Persuasive Speech)

"Carrot, my lord and savior. I believe that God is a carrot. I cant wait to see my creator, the carrot, who, sacrificed his only son, the cucumber, to save us from sin. I fear the Devil, who is a vegetable blender, for he is the way of evil. I believe salvation lies within liberating salad from super markets and through never eating vegetables. I shall lead a great life and live forever afterwards among the vegetables, and those who dont follow this way shall end up in hot, barbecue, hell where meat surrounds you for all eternity.

Now, you all are looking at me as if i've got lobsters crawing out of my ears, and you should be. Now, of course, I didnt mean any of what I said, but it sounded as unrealistic and stupid to you as your stories of God and Jesus sound to me. And why is this? Because you dont have any faith in the story i just told you, and I have no faith in the stories religion gives us. It all has to do with perception, and faith which is belief without proof. See, try and think of a way for me to -prove- my story to you. What if I gave you a cookbook that was written by four people who supposedly wrote what my made-up carrot God told them to write. Would you believe then?

What if you read the book and it told all about the life of the cucumber, who is like jesus, and all the miracles it performed, like turning ranch dressing into italian, and filling his followers with the Holy Carrot Juice so they could speak in the tongues of the potato and carrot. Would you be convinced upon hearing all the miracles he performed? What if the book told prophecies of the coming veggie-blenders and salad shooters? That is, if the book were made, say, 500 years ago before those were even a tiny idea. How about if you went to a convention of thousands of people who all chanted veggie-prayers to the Allmighty Carrot, and some were miraculously healed and some even able to speak the carrot and potato languages? What if I showed you the knife which was stabbed into the cucumber's side? If it still had the cucumber juices on it? You would not believe then either, because some cucumber juice on a knife doesnt prove anything except that a cucumber was stabbed some years ago. Well, what if I brought you a towel with the image of a cucumber imprinted on it, like the Shroud of Turin? Again, it proves nothing except thatg a cucumber was wrapped in a towel and somehow its imprint got onto the towel.

See, my argument isnt that i hate religion, or dont believe in a greater being, but rather its to show you that those who dont believe in God arent close-minded about God, but rather that we're too darn open-minded. One simple, non-proveable answer just doesnt cut it for us. You dont believe my carrot and cucumber story, saying, of course, that its true for the sake of arguement, because it just doesnt sound right to you. If I told you that the sky is black, we would argue for ages, but what if I actually saw the sky as black? What if thats the only color the sky has ever been for me my whole life? Am I a bad person for seeing the sky as a different color from you? No, i'm not a bad person for seeing the sky as a different color from everyone else. I am as bad a person for seeing a black sky as you are for liking rap music, or hating rock music, or any other things you percieve. And, who knows, what if everyone else sees the wrong color for the sky and i'm the only one who sees the real color? What the majority says or does isnt necessarily the right thing, even our own government was set up so that the minority would have an equal chance, because our founding fathers knew that the majority isnt always right. If you are with your friends and they all decide to go smoke pot, you're not gonna do it just because its what the majority has ruled, right?

I dont hate or have -any- dislike towards people who believe in God any more than you would dislike people who watch MTV or listen to country music. My problem comes when people try to convert me. If you try and convert me, its just like you saying "I dont accept you for who you are. You're a bad person for not believing in God, and so I will only be your friend if you believe with me. Otherwise, suffer in agony for eternity"

Now, excuse me for the analogy, but wasnt that Hitler's way of doing things? "Follow me or suffer the consequences."? He killed those who didnt follow him, you just sentence us to an eternity of rotting in a burning hell.

Take, for a moment, a genre of music you -hate- because it sounds awful to you and you highly dislike it. Now, try and see people all around you -loving- that genre and trying to make you listen to it, and saying that they wont be friends with you if you dont listen to it, or that you would suffer eternally if you dont start liking it. Thats is how we feel, supressed and repressed for being who we are. Whether we can change or not isnt a valid point, either, because any of us could start liking a genre of music we dislike if we're given it all the time or by any number of other means, but that would just be mean and wrong.

When asked if I am a religious person or believe in God, I immediately ask for that person's least favorite band or type of music, then, when they answer, I answer their question with a 'no'. Then, when they ask why I dont, I ask them why they dont like that band or type of music they mentioned. I just done, it doesnt "sound" right to me. I've read the bible, gone to church, prayed, the works, and it still just doesnt work for me. We all try our least favorite genre of music, which is how we find out we dont like it. Everything is about faith in things and perception of them. You see a blue sky and know that its blue, but I see a black sky and know its black, who's right? So, the next time you call someone who doesnt believe in God close-minded, remember the feeling you got when I told you my carrot story at the beginning, and then say that -we're- close-minded. The simple fact is that we -know- absolutely nothing. We see and ecperience things so often that we consider it knowledge, but its just combined perception. A blind person doesnt -know- that grass is green or that the sky is blue any more than we do. They're just names assigned to things our eyes percieve. A blind person -believes- that their house is red and that streets are black, but, until they see it, they dont -know- any of it. So, I leave you with this, you -believe- there is a god and an heaven and a hell, but none of you -know- it unless you've died. And since you're all sitting here, alive, infront of me, I assume all of you are just hoping that you're religious ideas are right. We dont know if God is a carrot, or that Jesus was the son of God, any more than a blind person knows that a rose is red."

The Future

The Shady figure in the trench coat stood reading his newspaper, right where he was told to be, he was even an hour early just to make sure that the transaction went through without a hitch. He was looking for just another face in the crowd, but this face would be one of many faces that would save the planet as we all know it. The man in the coat hiched up his high collar and adjusted himself where he stood, ready for a long, but worth while wait. It had been just another day when he got the anonymous call. He needed to know only where and when once they told him they pay off for this simple pick-up and delivery. He could retire immediately if he did just this one job. It was simple, wait by the bench on the east side of the airport, next to the keychain rack, with a three day old New York Times. Be there at ten, he had been told. He was looking for a girl who would be about five and a half feet tall, dark hair, scarf and a small roller suitcase. She would identify herself as Jade and ask if he was Thomas. He would acknowledge he was even though he had already been told that the real Thomas was already 'taken care of'.

He would then walk her to the limo out front, and at some point or another, either coax her into giving him the 'package' or just take it by force. They told him that if he was lucky that the man he was impersonating may be the one who the package was to be delivered to. Well he didnt give a damn, he would get what he was sent to get, one way or another, he didnt care, too much money was at stake, and clearly this package was worth a whole lot. Well the man in the coat stood reading his old New York Times, the biggest highlight of that day being "Underground Anti-Government Apocalyptic Cult". The man had read it several times and heard it on the news for months now. There was some group of freaks all over the world who thought that the world was going to end in the next year, 2012, and that the world would go into shambles. They were trying to get as many people as they could to 'open their minds' and 'arm themselves with knowledge' about how the world is going to end in the coming months. It was a bunch of crap, he knew, but it was sure getting a whole lot of people and attention lately. He figured they just drugged alot of people by sneaking into random water supplies.

Just as his legs were starting to cramp from having stood in place for so long, he got a break. A girl who fit the description walked just past him and glanced at him as she did. She seemed to want to find herself a keychain next to him. He adjusted his weight and waited for her to speak, when she didnt, he just assumed she was some other tourist and continued reading where he had been.

"You Thomas?" The girl spoke as she browsed through the keychains.

"Jade?" The man in the coat asked, lowering his paper. The girl nodded and had found a keychain of the statue of liberty which she smiled at and whispered "He'll love this!". She walked to the counter and purchased the item, walking away as if she didnt care one way or the other if he followed.

"The Limo's out front ma'am"

"Thanks." She responded quickly, looking all around her as if she were weary of being watched. Once they had made it across the crowded La Guardia Airport, he walked Jade to the Limousine, even opening the door for her, which was surprisingly the only time he had been nice to a mark, but what the hell, he was going to retire a rich man before the day was over, so whats a little courtesy at the last minute? The man in the coat climbed into the drivers seat and drove into the heavy traffic of taxis and bustling pedestrians. After he made it through he finally decided to get to business.

"Ma'am, now i'm just a lackey, so I dont know much, I just do what i'm told and am where I am supposed to be, when i'm supposed to be there. But, I have to ask, what's all the secrecy for? What -exactly- am I working for?" the man asked glancing at the young woman in his rear-view mirror.

"Thomas, did you read that paper you were told to be reading? Or did you just stand there trying not to stick out like a sore thumb?"

"I sure did read it, three days ago though when it first came out."

"And that cover story, about the Apocalyptic Cult, what are your feelings on it?"

"Well ma'am I dont think much, I mean with all the people getting into it, there has to be something to it right?"

"Well, Thomas, what I have here is crucial to their cause, to our cause. Mine and yours. And everyone on this planet."

"And what is it that can be so crucial to this? And shouldnt it be in a metal case with a handcuff attached to your wrist if its that important?"

"Of course it -should- be. But that just doesnt work without drawing suspicion. See Thomas I figure you should know what you are fighting for, what you are honestly risking your life for everytime we ask you a favor of us. See what I have here is the correspondences between the two generals of the cause, Thomas. We arent anti-government, we just know how they will act when this all goes to hell. And we arent an apocalyptic cult because we dont pray, we dont share a common God, or hold any sort of rituals at all, me merely see what is coming and do what we know we must to prepare for it. We have been preparing for years, you as well as everyone else only has been hearing about it because all we need now is people, numbers. Everything else is perfectly set up."

"Hmmm, well I suppose its none of my business really. I shouldnt have asked, I was better off not knowing." The man in the coat now wondered if it had been the government that sent him, then again if the government wanted this done, they would have their own guys do it, not some hired gun do a random pickup for them. No, he had been contacted, obviously, by the opposition to this cult, or whatever the hell it was. He didnt care, he only saw dollar signs as he looked at the girl in the backseat with her bag leaning onto her. When he was free of the traffic and he figured it was alright enough, he turned off the highway and down a path he knew well was usually deserted about three miles down it.

"Hey, we arent supposed to turn off until we hit Wantagh, where you going???" Jade asked, now slightly alarmed.

"They closed the offramp for Wantagh for construction, if you want to get there within the next hour you gotta turn off early." The man replied. He had always been a quick thinker, maybe thats why he was so good.

"Oh. Alright." She grabbed the bag and set it in her lap now, holding onto it like a little girl clutches a doll. The man in the dirvers seat now began to slow down and pulled over, the tinted windows and the mostly deserted road was all he needed. He turned around and leveled the silenced beretta at the young woman in the backseat.

"Well Jade, unfortunately I gotta cut your trip a little short." The girl in the back seat looked out all the windows around her as if there was something that she might see that could help her. She reached for the door handle and the man in the coat quickly locked all the back doors.

"Well, I dont know who you are Sir, but i'm sorry you had to choose this route. The other side probably contacted you after they offed Thomas, huh? Probably offered you a huge sum of money, more money than most people see in a lifetime huh? Well did they tell you that you would never see this money? That you would spend the rest of your days in their service either by choice or by force? Or how about the fact that they will torture and murder anyone you know, or have ever known? Did you think of any of that before you accepted? Or how about this fact, shithead, that someone as important as I am carrying something as important as this would have a hell of a lot more protection and cover than just some random wheelman probably living out of some seedy motel in Queens?"

The man in the coat was tired of this, and just wanted to get this taken care of, so he pulled the trigger once he knew it was aimed for the center of her head. Just as he did and he saw the flash of the shot and heard the muffled sound of the bullet being projected out of the gun, he felt a sharp pain in his left shoulder. The girl sat, unmoved, and unharmed in her spot in the back of the vehicle. The man in the coat now felt hot metal searing into the muscle of his left shoulder. It seemed impossible! He had leveled the shot! She was dead! She had to be! And right as he was about to pull the trigger the little bit of the conscience he had left whispered to him "I wouldnt do that if I were you." Suddenly the conscience was now a loud and audible voice in his head. "The first time's a warning, asshole. Next time you're gone. Now you have two choices, drive the lady to her destination and we may help you to a hospital, or you can pull the trigger again and see what happens. This one, however, I wont have bounce back into your shoulder. It -will- land somewhere in your brain that will paralyze you and make you feel more extreme pain and agony for hours until you finally die of exhaustion or blood loss. Your choice, buddy. Personally I would probably enjoy the option that doesnt include me dying."

The man in the coat was astounded, so many things were now becoming apparent to him. That there was both so much more to this world than he had ever imagined, that he was bleeding pretty badly and needed to get to a hospital in a half hour if he planned to save the nerves in his arm, and that the young woman in the backseat now pointed outside. The man looked out his window and saw a figure atop the hill across the street. It had been there for only a split second, but it was long enough to get the point across. He turned around and tossed the gun into the passenger seat next to him. He took off the hazard lights and pulled back onto the roadway.
"You know, if you want to live past today, you have only one option. If you go back having not collected what they sent you to, you are really gonna get it. And even if you went back with what they asked, they would still make you wish for death, they would say, because you were stupid enough to do anything for them. So, if you want help, if you have any loved ones, you must join us, because I promise they will hunt all of them down. And they will torture them for days, even weeks before they finally end their pain. You're stuck in the middle of this. So you either help us fight for our cause, or you die. The choice is yours."

The man in the coat listened to the girl's words and rolled them over in his mind. Suddenly a random though popped into his head, and he figured he may as well ask, it didnt matter, if he knew too much, he would be killed anyway right?

"If I can ask... why are the two generals sending their information through some young lady like yourself? I mean we have email, fax machines, cell phones, the internet, tons of other, faster ways to keep in touch with people, why this way?"

"Well, because its all monitored by the government now, they are looking through every email, tapping every call, reading every fax or piece of mail. This is the only secure way to transmit the information. The two generals need to give status reports of numbers of recruits, numbers of losses, number of monetary profit and gain, etcetera. I make this trip almost weekly. I'm surprised it's taken the opposition this long to figure out what was going on, though, you're showing up this long after we started shows we are doing a good job."

"I suppose you are right. But where do you fit in all of this? I mean you must be good at something that gave you this grea job of importance, right? So what did you do, or, more specifically, what is your significance?"

"Well," She held up her left hand and it showed she had an wedding ring on it. "I would say I fit just nicely into the equation, being the western general's wife." The man in the coat considered his options and knew he had to join them, but he still couldnt help the feeling that the money he could make from this would make all this nonsense go away. "You and all the other useless rabble in the world, my friend." the voice in his head spoke again, it was the same man's voice, young, probably in his twenties.

After following the directions by the young woman in the back seat the man in the coat arrived at a total normal looking home in the middle of a road of normal looking homes in the middle of Long Island. The house was decently sized, looked fit for a normal sized family. The lady in the back seat exited the vehicle with her baggage, after the man in the coat unlocked the door. His vision had steadily been blurring since he had hit the turnpike and he felt more and more light headed as the minutes ticked by. The door next to him opened up. A man stood there and motioned for him to move over to the passenger's seat, which he did as quickly as possible. The man adjusted the seat and drove off down the road.

"Well what's your decision?" The new driver asked.

"I dont know, its alot to take in. This has to be something huge, there must be more to it. But I just cant grasp the fact that everything i've ever known or expected out of this life, the government, or the world is a lie."

"I understand what you're saying, i'll take you to the hospital to think this all over." the driver said. After a few minutes he slowed down and put the car in park, opening up his door and stepping out of the car. The door slammed and rang through the man in the coat's head. He saw beyond the darkened windows two figures join the figure of the driver. He heard what he thought was one say "Up and then blast? Ok." And a moment later he felt as if he were suddenly on a roller coaster. The car had been sent soaring up into the air about twenty feet off the ground, at the apex of the blast, there was a small bright green light he saw out the side of his window that now pointed down at the figures below. Before he could react the light became huge in an instant. It crashed into the side of the car, the car went flying up and backwards into the trees, very quickly disintegrating as it did. Sparks and small specks of the car's frame caught the sun just right and glittered as it fell towards the ground.

In the distance the young woman could hear the faint blast as the car had disintegrated. The man to whom the house belonged, a person she knew well, now smiled warmly at her as he motioned for a welcoming hug. The young woman proceeded into the man’s arms and hugged him.
“Jade, welcome back…” The man stepped out of the doorway to let her in.
“General, thank you, it was an easy trip, despite the interruption.” She stepped inside the home.
It was a normal looking home, just like any other, if you didn’t know the importance of whom it was housing. Jade carried the case under her arm now and followed the man through the entryway and into the living room. It, too, looked just like a normal home, with chairs centered around a coffee table, all facing a TV. The general, like the home, didn’t seem of any specific importance at all either. He was no taller than 5’8”, and didn’t wear any sort of military or formal clothes you might expect to find on a person who held the title of ‘general’. He had long black hair, and seemed to be of Spanish descent, although his voice, attitude, and choice of clothes didn’t reflect it. He was young, too, like Jade was. The general walked casually through the house, finally coming to a doorway to a library. It wasn’t large by any means, however it seemed to fit the needs of one who would like his own personal collections of important volumes.
The general pulled one of the books out of the front bookcase and opened it up. Cut out of a chunk of pages was a hole that perfectly fit the size and shape of a key inside. He closed the book and replaced it on the bookshelf after having removed the key. He now moved to the bookcase on the right side of the room, where he flipped open the spine to a hardback book labeled “Ishmael”, revealing a keyhole as well as a number pad. Into the keyhole he inserted the key he had removed from the previous book, and upon the keypad he typed 2-0-1-2.
Jade heard the release of the locks inside of the bookcase she had been in many times.
“Malady, please…” The eastern general bowed his head slightly and motioned his hand towards where just a moment ago a case full of books had been; now there was only a dimly lit entryway leading down a flight of stairs. Jade proceeded down the dimly lit stairway into the basement of the home which had been modified to have no other entrances.

Choices

There's no such thing as choices
life's just a straight line
Looking back, you hear their voices
The path of good is so fine.
When you stop and look back
the answers seem clear
You cant take your mistakes back
and you've got everything to fear
Every one of us, has such a jaded past
All your haunted choices, coming at you fast
All the same old questions, "What if?" and "Why me?"
A forked lightening of choices, is all that you can see
If you take a look back
the answers, you will see
So never even glance back
Or your past is what you'll be.

Untitled

I am walking through a cemetery with only the howling wind and the vast ominous graves to keep me company. The snowflakes fall upon my face, melting, blending with the tears that drip from my chin onto my coat. Soon the tears in my eyes and the snowfall beating against me make it impossible to see through my glasses. I remove my eyeglasses and place them into my coat pocket, walking towards a destination I wish I'd never arrive at. My head swam, as it had since the accident, with thoughts of my lost love. We hadn't left each others side for years, and now I knew I'd never hold her in my arms again. This thought overwhelmed me and I dropped to my knees, sobbing, in front of the engraved stone bearing my lover's name. I could taste her sweet lips, and feel her kisses, her loving touch. I could smell the strawberry scent of her hair as if she were in front of me right now, but I knew she was six feet under my bent knees, and that I'd never love again. I threw my arms around her headstone; the ice covering it gave me a numb feeling, but this was no solace for my grief. Her lips on mine, everything seemed alright, but now my lips would never have that comfort. My own arms now held me in a close embrace, trying to make me feel the love no one would ever again feel for me. We promised each other on the day we married that we'd never leave each others side and I now planned to keep my promise. As I lowered my ear to the frozen ground, I could almost hear her soft voice in my ear as the black abyss of eternal sleep slowly crept over me. I whispered her name, knowing we'd soon be reunited.

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Crimson Coat

"All results thus far show that the nanobots are indiscriminate as to what they attack." Dr. Henry Larkin spoke into his personal voice recorder as her wheeled around the lab in his computer chair. "My evaluation is as follows: The nanobots cannot be used as a form of chemical warfare until a way to specify the targets is found." Dr. Henry Larkin turned back to the large glass container which held several clear vials, a lab rat dead from the nanobots and sealed in its own container, and a live rat, sealed in its own container as well. Dr. Larkin knew that the seemingly empty vials harbored, on a microscopic level, an incredibly deadly threat to all organic life. This idea plagued him for a moment, but he shook it off and continued on with his work.
Dr. Larkin gripped his hands upon the black joysticks his fingers were so familiar with. As the robotic arms within the sealed glass case moved around with the joysticks, he wondered how something so small as the nanobots, could be so deadly. The answer was clear, the smaller something is, the easier it is to catch, and the harder it is to get rid of. But soon Dr. Larkin realized that there was something amiss within the container he was working with. The first rat, to whom the nanobots had been administered, was dead and unmoving inside its airtight box, but not, the second rat was equally lifeless and unmoving. "How the heck???" he thought as he moved to confirm that the rat was indeed dead, and not just sleeping.His heart began to race within his chest before he'd even thought he might have cause to panic. But it only took Dr. Larkin to come up with a reasonable answer to the second rat's fate. He figured that the nanobots must have evolved, and that through the wonders of AI, they had found a way to break out of their many glass prisons, and seal the fate of the second lab rat who could do nothing but claw at the walls he would never be free of. "If they broke out of their containers and into the second rat's box, that means..." Dr. Larkin raced over to put on a gas mask, even though he didn't know how well it's work, or if it was too late.
His heart throbbed faster, and his breathing increased with it. Henry knew that his heart did not beat fast from panic, but rather from the way the nanobots were now assaulting his internal organs. Hundreds of thousands of microscopic robots now raced through his lungs, into his blood stream, and into his heart. There they clogged its ventricles and forced its muscles to expand and contract faster and faster every minute.
The lack of oxygenated blood cause Dr. Larkin's vision to blur, and as it did his mind drifter to questions it'd never know the answers to. He wondered if his wife, Tanya, and son, Billy, would survive the coming man made epidemic, he also wondered what the nanobots next evolution would be. He figured it likely that John, who was currently on his lunch break, would soon stumble upon the ill-fated doctor, and unknowingly release the mechanical virus into the rest of the building, and out into the world. He could only hope that some impurity of the outside environment would cause the destruction of the robots.
The doctor's heart could finally pump no more, the pressure inside it forced the heart to expand. Dr. Larkin heard a loud pop and felt a sharp pain in his chest as his heart exploded within it. The force of the blast was so strong that his rib cage snapped outward; his muscles and skin giving way, staining his pearly white lab-coat crimson. The invisible plague within Henry seeped back out into the laboratory, its target successfully neutralized. The Head Bio-Weapons Researcher for the Department of Defense Dr. Henry Scott Larkin's dying thought was simply, "God help us..."

Left 4 Dead Multiplayer review

I am here to tell you the story of four people, on a deserted highway full of abandoned vehicles and hungry zombies. The survivors first grab some first-aid kits and weapons from the trunk of an empty car. Suddenly a swarm of zombies ran at the four from all directions, coming even out of the forest surrounding the highway. In the midst of the frenzy, one of the survivors accidently shot all the others in the head, with his wide-spraying shotgun. On the next attempt, another of the survivors noticed that one of the others really didn’t use their ability to push back zombies (which can kill zombies after a few whacks, and keep them at bay to reload, or put them at a better distance to shoot without fear of hitting the other survivors), but instead of calling him a “noob”, yelling at him for doing something that will get everyone killed, they simply reminded him every time he accidently hit one of others, to push a zombie back before shooting, if they were too close to another survivor.

Around the second act, things were picking up and getting more intense. Poorly aimed molotov’s that flew over a Tank’s head; Witches startled unnecessarily; the entire group wiped-out because someone threw their pipe bomb too close/soon. And yet, everytime, nobody yelled, got angry, blamed the game for glitches, or called each other names.

By the third act, the four survivors were melding so well together that everything seemed to flow effortlessly, and it was suddenly all about the survivors, as a whole unit, just trying to make it to the evacuation point. Each alleyway, and every store was gone through as a group. When anyone needed to get something, nobody went alone. If they were huddled together, they pushed back the horde as one, and reloaded at separate intervals, so supressing fire was never in short supply.

Each time that the survivors made it to a safe house, all four made it inside, every time. Nobody left anyone behind, who wasn’t already completely dead, no matter how dreary the situation would put you in to rescue them. To each survivor, two shotguns, or assault rifles, were always better than one. Nobody wanted to be left alone. Nobody wanted to be a rogue getting the highest score. Everyone wanted to have at least one other person there to watch their back.

The final act, and the four survivors make it to a house on the water’s edge, and radio a fishing boat to rescue them. One survivor on the gatling gun, one man keeping the zombies off him, one man covering a stairway, and another covering the nearby doorway. Everyone in line of sight of the other. When a Smoker’s tongue grabbed someone, they were instantly recovered. Every Hunter that pounced, was immediately knocked off of the teammate. They needed every bullet they could possibly spare.

The first Tank arrives, and one of the survivor’s goes down. Not good. One less combat shotgun to take down the next Tank that would inevitably show up. Outlook: grim. The lost survivor speaks directions and warnings from beyond the grave to those remaining alive. Three minutes left before the boat arrives. Within moments another wave attacks. They take them down, but barely. All remaining survivors are close to death, and jumpy as hell with the adrenaline rush.

The second Tank, just as the fishing boat comes into view, climbs up the side of the house. All three remaining survivors jump off the balcony, one is incompacitated in the process. He shoots a gas can, setting himself and the Tank aflame. The Tank makes quick work of him, moving on to chase the remaining two. A boulder thrown at one of the two, is then beaten senseless by the now charred-black Tank. The last survivor strafes through the trees with the Tank and a swarm of zombies hot on his heels, just as the fishing boat arrives at the end of the dock.

The screams, shouts and cheers echo forth from my headset as the only survivor left is rescued and the campaign is finally completed.

That was my night last night. Two and a half hours to complete the full Death Toll campaign on Expert. It was truly epic.

Now for the real review, or more accurately, the comparison, as I believe all reviews are merely a series of comparisons to other things put together.

I want to say first that, I believe, Left 4 Dead is the first -truly- co-operative first person shooter ever. I have played many FPS’s for a very long time, from the first Turok games on N64, Goldeneye, Half-Life 1 and 2 (and all the other expansions side stories with it, Opposing Force, etc) as well as Counter-Strike, Team Fortress 1 and 2, Call of Duty 4, Halo 1-3, Metroid Prime series, Battlefield 2142, as well as many other games that require a group (Mario Party, Rock Band, WoW) or team. But most of the time, working as a team is merely a suggestion, when all that matters is that your team, as a whole, got more kills than the other, or captured the flag more times than the other did. Even still, such success only really requires one really good player on the team to achieve the goal of winning. This is not the case with Left 4 Dead.

Left 4 Dead is doing for First Person Shooters what Rock Band has done for Parties. Complete strangers getting together, bringing their various strengths and weaknesses to the table, and just having a terrific time, even if you dont always win, or get the best score. This is something that, in my opinion, has -never- been seen in multiplayer first-person shooter before: The desire to not pwn everyone and get the highest score, while simultaneously making your team hate you by calling them names, just because you have anonymity and want everyone to know you have more free time to devote to video games than they do.

The truth is that Left 4 Dead is the first FPS I have ever played that, in the very nature of its gameplay, weeds out people who dont work well with others. I have logged many, many hours into this game, and played every campaign several times through on Advanced and Expert. And every time I’m in a new group, by the end of the campaign, the other 3 I played with are on my friends list, and I am eager to play with them again some time in the near future.

The fact is that, you really do have to be nice, and be friendly, and realize peoples similarities, and differences, and adapt to them as best as you can. Otherwise nobody gets anywhere, and you start back from the beginning. In my opinion, L4D is also the first truly survivial-horror game, in the sense that, you dont get to save, and the checkpoints can either seem reeeeally far away, or really close depending on the campaign, act, and how pissed off The Director is at you. If you make it to the last 2 feet before the safe house, and everyone dies, you start back from the beginning. Now, usually, this would tick me off about a game, but L4D happens to do this with a new finesse that somehow makes this just fine, and even more exciting and visceral. Somehow, when you dont make it, it always feels like you didnt plan correctly, or execute the plan correctly, rather than the sentiments that the computer AI is over-powered, or your teammates are being “noobs”. If your teammates are “noobs” you have no choice but to help them when they go down. Even if they kill one zombie thats one zombie you dont have to, not to mention that your teammates pills, pipe bombs, molotov’s and med kits will save your life no matter how good they are or aren’t.

This leads me to my next point. The fact is, the premise of the game is that of four strangers having to work together to make it to a safe place, alive, and that everyone relies upon everyone else to survive. No matter the differences of gender, age, or race, the four survivors are all in the same predicament: they’re not infected, and it’s a long way to safety. This is why I personally love the ‘matchmaking’ system. In L4D, you dont get a server list to select from. You pick the campaign and difficulty you want, and whether you want to be in a game that has already started, or one that is about to start. Thats it. For me, this adds, very much, to the in-game idea of four strangers working together. You have very little time to learn your teammates level of skill, experience, weapon of choice, and accuracy. You just run, shoot and figure it out on the fly. Nobody disagrees; everyone gives their two-cents here and there as to the best strategy, but nobody really knows what is coming and therefore nothing can really be planned accurately, since you never know what is around the next corner, thanks to The Director’s random spawns. You can, however, find out how your team works as unique individuals and accommodate your style to best suit the situation, so that you are all functioning, together, as one.

I have been lucky enough not to run into many (if any) glitches that I could say were definitive ‘bugs’ in gameplay. Nor have I played with anyone who used or showed me any ‘exploits. I am not sure if thats because I have been lucky so far, or not. I have read of many issues with glitches, and I really wish I had these glitches, because then I could better understand those who call this game ‘unpolished’ or ‘unfinished’, or even ‘too expensive for what was delivered’. I truly apologize to anyone who has been having any technical difficulties, and I hope that someday soon Valve will fix the issues, and you may be able to experience the game as I have.

In conclusion, I cannot say that this game is ‘perfect’ simply because I dont think such a thing exists. It is everything and more than I thought it would be, based on the demo, it has kept me entertained for hours everyday since its release, it has allowed me to make many new friends, its made me feel physically jittery and jumpy long after I stopped playing, and it was worth every penny I spent on it.

This game can only get better as new updates and releases of maps come out, and I’m sure that there will be terrific player-generated content sometime too. As the game is today, it is everything I could have asked for, and dreamed of in an FPS zombie survival horror game, even surpassing beloved RE4. It is -truly- scary, when you get jumped on by a Hunter, and it is -truly- exhilarating when you complete the campaign, even if your character died.

If you own this game already and haven’t experienced any of what I have mentioned here, I suggest maybe playing this game with friends, playing more often (I may be just lucky to have gotten awesome teammates every time), or play on Expert difficulty. And lastly, if Left 4 Dead disappointed you, or didn’t meet your expectations, maybe you should re-think your expectations before you realize no game will ever meet them.

And if you don’t own this game, and FPS’s or zombie movies and games is your thing, what in the hell are you waiting for???

Thank you for reading!

P.S. I also find it terrific that L4D is the first game that, while spectating, waiting to be rescued from a closet, is still thrilling and exhilarating, anyone else feel that/agree?

Sages

Peering through teary eyes, I look over at where my sages had been. Only emptiness fills the vacuum left by their former presence.

"This isn't the way it was supposed to be!" I cry out to the darkness around me.

"The fact that this is how things have become prove it was supposed to be this way." The memories of those who once filled the void answer back.

My sages, my wise ones. They connected me to spirit and consciousness I hadn't experienced.

"I thought you would always be there. We all said you would..." I sobbed uncontrollably, floating through the abyss.

"Those were merely words. Words that fell and were unnoticed like a single grain of sand. Our actions are what survive eternity; our words will forever be lost." The memories echoed back.

They had been around for as long as I can remember. Parts of a whole, we were. Both physical, mental, emotional, spiritual. Whole. It was Nirvana when we were around. We were able to shake hands, hug, hold, love, and be. It was an all-consuming feeling.

"I cannot do this alone. I am so alone..." I let the wave of anger get supressed by sadness as another wave of tears rolled down my face.

"If you cannot, then you will perish. A long, slow, painful deah. Emotional death, spiritual death, then eventually your physical self shall perish. Is this what you wish?" My brain rattled from the bluntness of the statement.

The anger came out now. No longer contained.

"You all left me! You are gone! I am all alone and you wish me dead! You want me to suffer without you! You are selfish." I screamed.

"Yes, anger, let it out. It's healthy. Selfish? Who is selfish? The ones who leave to continue their own journies, or the man crying for others to change and alter their lives to be apart of his? You should really understand your language's definitions before spouting them out." The memories and the void seemed to sneer at me. Mocking me.

It had been many long years. We had experienced every journey there was to imagine, and still we had held together, still had limitless adventures to undergo.

I didnt speak.

"Silence? Do not mistake your silence for acceptance. You are far from that. You must understand what has happened. Allow the emotions to come through, and run their course. If you will not speak on your own, how about a question? If we are gone, then to whom are you speaking?"

The question seemed simple to begin with, I was going to give the simple and obvious answer. I paused. Then answered anyway, to test my theory.

"I am talking to myself..."

"Yes, yes you are. But why is it that you are being answered in ways you would not answer yourself?"

"Because... it doesn't matter if you are here or not. I know exactly what you will say. I already have the wisdom that I thought I needed you around to inbue me with. You have already given me that gift, and it can never leave."

"Like a scar. For better or worse, it will always be there, and everytime you see it, you will have all the same memories you had as if it had just happened. Our impressions on you had no effect on physical proximity or how often we spoke. Just by having the experiences we have had together, we have made a permanent version of each other in each of our consciousness"

I sat up. I could see the circular floor under me. The void passed by as I stood on the platform. I was no longer drifting through darkness, and now gliding through the unknown. The pedestals where my sages had once stood were again visible.

"Allow us to be where we were and exactly what we were. A scar may make you smile and frown, but it will forever be there, and you must let it just be. Choose to enjoy the good memories, but understand the bad ones. Let them both pass through you effortlessly."

I remembered each and every one of my sages, friends, my loves. Their faces, their voices, their spirits, their auras, their happiness, their sadness, their anger, their clothes, their skin, their love, their eyes, their consciousness, their words.

Each of the spots where they used to stand began to fill as I remembered each part of them.

Finally they were all there again, as if they had never left. All smiling.

There was an extra spot now, one that was open.

"Why is there an extra spot? Nobody is missing."

My sages all laughed simultaneously.

"Nobody that you know yet is missing. You are naive but we didnt think you were -that- naive. Even if we were all going to always be together, you thought it would be -just- us?" They laughed again, then continued...

"That spot is just one, and once it is filled, it will lead you to circles beyond this one. Your spirit is old and you are wise beyond your years, but remember, you are still very young. Not even a quarter through your physical existence."

I spoke now, smiling at the familiar faces that beemed at me.

"Thank you. I love you all so much. I love you more than anything. I love you more than anything can express."

"I love you too." They spoke in unison. "Remember us."

This Guitar Hero/Rock Band War Has Gotten Out of Hand

Yes, I'm going to be the first to say it. Harmonix, and Activision, you are SCREWING GAMERS. I want to say first that I love these music-rhythm games, so this is not a blog rant about people getting hooked on them and not playing real instruments or whatever. This is a plead to the companies. Please stop warring, you are milking poor gamers and parents of young gamers for money. Its gotten ridiculous.

First of all, the instruments for Rock Band 2 and Guitar Her World Tour are slightly different. The GHWT drum pad has one less pad (so there are three in the center instead of four) and adds two cymbal-pads. Great, how the HELL are you supposed to choose which works for you better? And the guitar for GHWT has a touch-pad for faster shredding. Great, so, if I had RB already, i'd now want to spend 70 or 80 bucks for a new guitar controller (or two if you have guitar and bass).

Now, on to the Song Lists. By separating song lists, you divide gamers and friends. If two friends each get a different game (one gets RB2 and the other GHWT) depending on what kind of songs or bands you like, you will prefer one or the other game. So, if you arent into the other game's songs, or dont know them well, when it comes time for a party, you may be put off, or, if its down to a decision of whose party-house to goto, someone will get left behind. So, you just spent 180 bucks on a game that your friends may not wanna jam with you on. Guess you should just hope that you can find some online friends via forums or something.

On to DLC, which doesnt require as much time as ive mostly covered this in my songlist rant. By having artists choose one or the other, you are polarizing people. What if your favorite band hasnt made an appearance on either game and finally, you hear about it coming out for the OTHER version than the one you purchased? Guess you gotta flush out another $60 to buy the other game's disk and download the content.

Unlike the Console-Wars where certain companies sign on with each console beforehand, and that title or series is always seen on that console (even if it is later ported to others as well) you are making a generally stable investment. You know your favorite games and gaming companies, and you can make a stable investment to ensure that you have the correct console for the games you like when they release. You do not get this guarantee from the artists. First off, artists are not publishing on their sites their preference to which game they want their songs on (and i understand the legal reasons behind this) second, each company is not telling their player-base the specific songs and bands that they are trying to get ahold of. This means you have NO IDEA if your favorite band will make an appearance on either game.

So, basically, when companies war, the gamers/players lose. Hands-down. I've scoured many forums and there are a LOT of people who are just going to get both games. This is ridiculous. Personally, I believe that the two companies need to work together and create the next music-rhythm game. This would be ideal, because they could pool their ideas, money, and resources, and the companies would look more legitimate when presenting the idea to the various artists. As we've seen RB2 and GHWT have ~15 songs in common! What the hell guys?! Please dont make gamers pay twice for something they already have, this is ridiculous. If you are going to compete, be competative, not replicative.

In the end, I believe that the two companies getting separate set lists and instrument tweaks/designs, it is a terrible disservice to the gamers, and to fans of music and the artists.

I will state, however, that if I have to choose, I will likely be getting GHWT. The reason behind this is that my favorite bands are Tool, Slipknot, Nine Inch Nails, Static-X, Rage Against the Machine, A Perfect Circle, System of a Down, Korn, (old)LinkinPark, just to name a few, and to finally see Tool release not one but THREE songs for a rhythm game is amazing, plus that may also mean more Tool and possibly APC downloadable content. Also, they've had RAtM and Slipknot music on GH before, so, it just seems to me to be my best bet. On a side note, what the hell is up with them putting Lacuna Coil's Our Truth on there??? Why the hell wouldnt they put the vastly better recognized "swamped"? This is my complaint for a lot of the bands on GH and RB is that the put songs on there that fans of the band specifically would know, but the average joe who listens to the genre wouldnt. I think they need to put more songs on there that are best recognized by the majority, and then later release whole albums for the hardcore fans of the artist, but thats just my opinion and im sure someone will tell me that the songs listed are in fact the most recognizeable, or something like that. I would love to see SOAD's 'Steal This Album' on there, and definately none of the stuff from LinkinPark's newest album should be on there, but that is just my personal opinion. But, I was very pleased to see Korn's Freak on a Leash, and Filter's Hey Man Nice Shot. I would love to see some Powerman 5000, Rob Zombie, Marilyn Manson, and Godsmack on there too.

Also, wtfs up with the editing? Couldnt they make an unfiltered version? Or give the players the option to buy unedited versions of the songs? I mean if ur paying for ur favorite song on DLC, you shouldnt be forced to have them cut out the curse words that accentuate the songs. But thats for another time.

Vastness

The following is a fictional short story im working on, enjoy whats in it so far...


As your eyes scan across this text, you must know one truth about the words you are reading. They are lies. Every word that you see before you is a filthy lie, at its worst, and at its best, it's a horrendously failed attempt at conveying a message beyond words, description, definition, or explaination. This text is illegal to our government, and by reading it, you are agreeing to being labeled a Neo-Nazi, a communist, a terrorist. I am a terrorist and this is terrible propaganda. Terror is the point of these words, to strike fear, to terrorize, to scare. My hope is that I will scare the blinders off of you, and you will wallow in the sweet sorrow I have been in for years. If I am going down, I refuse to go down alone.

Know that this story is a virus in the most real sense possible. Already, by reading this far, the infection has begun to spread. You cannot stop the spread, as it is currently spreading through the curiosity portion of your brain. By now, you have little choice but to read on, let the sickness take its hold, and run its course. The worst diseases in the world are diseases of the mind, and it is my intention to top those illnesses, and infect you with a disease even worse. An incurable disease that permeates your every fiber, and will never let you free of its ever-presence. I must now continue administering the disease.

Chapter 1

The most extreme and profound events in human or personal history have been based around a word or phrase. I will tell you the phrase that marked my childhood history. Fame and fortune. Everyday that I sat down in front of the television, I saw celebrity news, rumors, and interviews. The same went for the War. Everyone was famous. If you had a child or relative, or friend who served in the war and passed away, you were granted fifteen minutes on the local news channel. Tragedy thrilled those whom it had not personally struck, and it turned unknown people into eternal heroes.

The Contention of How/Why

I recently came to a realization. I realized that there are many things that humans have the ability to do, that separates us from the animals around us. Nothing special there, but let me delve into that for a moment.

Humans have two things that defines our specific abilities. The first is constructive thought in the form of 'how'. This is our ability to understand ecosystems, our biological place on the planet, the way that symbiotic relationships between species form a cycle that continues to replenish life on the planet.

The way I break that down is that an eagle in the USA doesn't know about elephants or wolves, or bacterium. It eats when its hungry, sleeps when its tired, and procreates when it can. If it does happen upon an elephant, it doesn't try and understand the thing. It doesn't try and distinguish it from the other things that it knows of. It merely accepts it as something that is either harmful to itself, or not.

Human beings cannot do this. We cannot just look at something and not try and understand it. We have a craving to understand it. This is where Science has come in. It's the best tool we have made for the 'How' question we have about everything around us.

Schools all over the world accept that we must teach our children as much of the 'How' that we can. This is seen in English class (in English-speaking countries) because you must know how to use your language. It's seen in Mathematics and Science, as you must understand how the planet works, as well as the creatures on it. It is also seen in History class as we must understand how things came to be the way they are today.

That covers the 'How', and now I get to the 'Why'.

There is an increasing movement here in the USA to have prayer and creationism taught in our schools. Until recently I dismissed it as religious totalitarianism, but I finally understand it is much more than that.

Religion seems that it would develop naturally from our consciousness. Our consciousness separates us from the animals, however, unlike instinct, we cannot just go through consciousness and just 'feel it out'. We have to feed the 'How' of our consciousness and enrich the 'Why'. However, in order to make our consciousness seem understandable, and attainable, we have to put limits on it. If we say to ourselves "our consciousness leads us to God. And I have the rules of which to follow to attain great knowledge and understanding of the way the world works. The rules are here in this book, my Bible." then, it helps us to get a better grasp on the hugely, and infinitely amazing depth of our consciousness. We feel that we have control of it, and understanding of it.

This is the 'Why'. Why are we here? Why am I lonely? Why did the universe come into existence. The fact is that Religion is the most widely accepted answer to this 'Why'. You are here because God put you into your body. You are lonely as a test of your faith. The universe came into existence because God wanted to make existence. Religion is the only widely accepted answer to 'Why'. And that is where the problem comes from.

The fact is that the sceintific people of the 'How' answers believe that there is only 'How' and that through 'How' everything can eventually be attained. The 'Why' religious people believe that all answers can be attained through 'Why'. And neither wants to accept that both questions, How and Why, are necessary for our human consciousness.

The proof that How and Why are necessary are seen everyday. We need religion, but why? Because it answers Why. It is the most widely accepted answer to 'Why'. If you do not want religion to be around anymore as the New Atheists do, then create a new form of Why. Instead, they fall on their sword and say that How is the only answer and need for answer. So, all the religious who have asked Why, and have gotten answers from their religious leaders, are being told 'Nope. Not only do you have no answers, but the way you are going about getting answers is all wrong.' And this negates their feeling that they got/get when their 'Why' is answered. This negates their peak experiences that they are told is the Divine Hand. You cannot take a basket of apples from someone and hand them a single orange and try and convince them that they aren't losing anything.

The same goes for religion. Someone with a basket of oranges, the scientific and New Atheist community, cannot be shown an apple and be told 'this is all you need. If you have this, you shall never need anything else.' If you talk eloquently enough, they may be dissuaded from their basket of oranges, and once they try the apple, may end up staying with apples. They eat this apple, and it tastes wholly different from the oranges they have been so used to. The same goes for the religious. However, both side goes too far. What we need is BOTH apples and oranges in our basket. The fact that people can enjoy both apples and oranges, and everyday, thousands of people transition from an apple to an orange, or from an orange to an apple, this fact, shows that there must be something about oranges and apples that we need.

What we must realize is that it isn't the apple or the orange that we need, but both, as well, we must understand both why and how of each. How can we transition between apples and oranges? Because our tastebuds allow us to taste the various flavors. Why do we transition between apples and oranges? Because there is something about each that you cannot get from the other.

This comes back to the idea that I mentioned earlier. The want for prayers in schools. However, if creationism is taught alongside evolution, it will degrade the scientific value of evolution. And it will degrade and confuse children because how are they supposed to choose which science to follow? The problem is that schools (elementary, middle and high schools) only require knowledge of How, and only teach How. People are to learn the various Why outside of school. But every person needs to answer for themselves Why, and to keep it outside of schools, means that everyone accepts that people do not need to know Why, or at least, they dont need it enough to be taught about it.

So, the problem comes from this because there is no Why in schools. That is, at the core, what those who want Creationism/Intelligent Design in schools want to see. However you cannot teach children a How in the same breath of Why. It confuses and twists things in their head.

So, here is my proposition. A compromise. Prayer cannot be brough back into schools, because you must then ask 'Which prayers'? If its the Hail Mary, Christians cannot accpet that, as they do not pray to Mary. And if you pick the Lord's Prayer, you will ostricize the Muslims, non-theists, and all the various other religions. It would cause more problems than it is worth. The solution is not creationism in schools. But Why in schools. The people who are pro-How will be anti-Why. And the pro-Why are becoming increasingly anti-How, taking their children to religious private schools, or homeschooling them.

The compromise is realizing the source and core of why the religious Fundamentalists want creationism in schools. They want their children to understand Why. Unfortunately, they are given an extremely narrow view of Why, as with most religions. The Why needs to accept that, not only are there many various types of Why, but also that their children do need How. And the How need to accept that everyone needs Why.

I propose that we teach our children Why in schools. Not the Christian Why, or the Muslim Why, or the Catholic Why, or the New Age Why. We must teach them all these Why's, and the Why of Nietzsche, and Krishnamurti, and Daniel Dennett, and the Why of Buddha, and of both eastern and western philosophies.

The fact is that we need our children to understand the Why, and learn critical thinking and understanding of mass consciousness. This is innate with us. If we teach them How and they have a peak experience, and someone with a Bible tells them it was Jesus Christ, they will be Born Again. If we tell our children that Allah and Muhammad are Why, and someone comes along with fossils of evolution, they will doubt and question their Why teachings and may drop them entirely. However, Whyers and Howers never lose their want for the answer to both. A Hower asks "What is our place in this universe, and what happens when we die?" and they are answered by Howers "We came from the things that came before us, and we do not yet know exactly what happens when we die, but we are gonna find out someday". The Whyer asks "Wat is our place in the universe, and what happens when we die?" and they are answered by the other Whyers of their faith "God put us here. And you go to heaven when you die. Any other question you may ask, the answer is that we do not know, but God will show us someday."

This shows that we need the How and Why both. I am trying to imagine a world where our children come home from school speaking of Buddha and Christ, and Dennett and Nietzsche in the same breath. A Philosophy class thoroughout our schooling, I believe, is necessary. We must stop denying that all humans ask Why and will search for answers to it. We must stop driving them from school and into their Churches or Mosques for these answers. We must stop denying that all humans ask How and will search for answers to it. We must stop driving them into schools and making them ostricized from those who ask Why.

A child of Christian parents, a child of Muslim parents, a child of Atheist parents, all four years old, are on a playground. None of the children fight or squabble any more than with those of their own parent's faith. But take a Muslim, a Christian, and an Atheist adult in the same room, and what happens? Each has locked themselves into their own How/Why view. Something happens between the time that those children become adults. We get solidified into a single ideal. The ideal of science, of everlasting life, of heaven, of reincarnation. Now imagine if children were taught Eastern and Western philosophies and religions from an early age. Do you think they would hijack an airplane? Try and convert the poor of Third Worlds to Christianity? Do you think that they would get into a shouting match on Youtube comments section against the Fundamentalists? Or do you think that they would be more critical thinkers? Do you think they would have more respect, and knowledge, of their fellow man?

When it all comes down to it, every single human being with consciousness asks both How and Why. We are all How/Whyers. The problem is when we lose sight of that and make ourselves Hower or we make ourselves Whyers. We are not one group against another, we are people who are trying to grasp our vast consciousness, and live our lives as best as we can.

Thank you for your time.

Floating Over the Cliff's Edge

The scariest thing about vertical growth of consciousness is a hands-off understanding and growth of it, at least directly hands-off. The thing that I myself have a hard time getting past is that through meditation and self understanding you will grow. You may never reach the ultimate constant witnessing of a peak experience, but you must enjoy the occassional samsara.

The hard thing to grasp is that growth of consciousness will come naturally, like a plant, given the right conditions. However you must make sure that you are at the most optimum condititions to recieve that seed's growth. The soil, the basis for the seed's life, must be nutrient rich. Keep learning and understanding to enrich your consciousness' soil. The seed will need sunlight to be able to feed itself. Keep meditating to ensure that your consciousness can sustain itself without your direct interferance. Keeping all your conditions optimum means that eventually the seed will grow, your consciousness will expand and you will flex/flow. But, like the soil and the sun, it doesn't wait for the seed. It doesnt need the seed to benefit all the other seeds and life.

That is the hard part, keeping yourself at optimum condidtions and not yearning or waiting for the seed to arrive. I happen to be very goal-oriented, and when I want to accomplish something, I get it done. However, I've come to realize that this driving mechanism for my existance up until now, is tethering me to lower-consciousness. This striving for learning and understanding has gotten me this far, and I now realize that it too must be let go of.

I currently dangle over the cliff's edge. I'm surrounded and can peer into the hyperspace of open consciousness. However i'm dangling off the cliff's edge, tethered to it by the things i've used to get me to the cliff and finally to jump. The jump wasnt hard. I wanted it, and I wanted to understand it. I wanted to be immersed in it. That is the cord that keeps me attached to the cliff. I am so close to hyperspace, I can see it, but I'm not free of the cliff enough to explore and understand it.

That's when it happened. My dreams seem, for me, to be the ultimate gateway into understanding. In a dream, you are aware of this new world, and you completely accept and understand it with no need to explore it as a new whole, because it is a part of you. The lucid dream, though paramount, is hard to achieve. You must break free of the blind acceptance of the dream, but you must do it gently as to not shock yourself awake. The integral balance lies within the lucid dream.

Understanding lucid dreams made me understand something else. If a dream is the usual, the normal, the accepted, and the lucid dream is seeing all and understanding all in the dream without exploring or needing to research, then so is the relation to everyday life and mass consciousness. Not many people lucid dream, and even fewer remember it if they do. There are many techniques to make yourself likely to attain such a dream, but there are no guarantees. You just have to do what you can and be prepared for the moment when it arrives.

I've realized that today. I need to learn and explore and grow within my world. However, there are so many books, and maps, and understandings of the world. There are even books and techniques to achieve the hyperspace of consciousness. But there are no books on what that consciousness is, or how to guarantee its attainment, or the personal changes you have to make or un-make to be apart of it. That's because, "the limits of my language are the limits of my world". We do not yet have enough understanding to put it into words, and there are so many unknown variables that a how-to guide can only be vague at best.

And it has suddenly 'clicked'. I was trying to know and understand this hyperspace, and get there already. I made the jump but I was still attached to the cliff.

There is no jumping. You don't jump off the cliff at all. You stand at its edge and step off the edge. Once off it's edge you disintegrate as your former sense of one goes away and you become a part of that consciousness. You do not seek to understand it, because you are it.

With this new understanding I awoke this morning feeling euphoric and in a creative meditative state. Yesterday I was dangling from the cliff, attached by unknown and unseen cords and tethers. I now am floating off the cliff's edge. Still attached to the cliff, but understanding that I am. Knowing that I am attached to it, but in knowing that, I am far better off than I was before. I am ensuring that my soil and sun are at the optimum conditions. I no longer need to dangle, by dangling, the tethers become my focus, another thing to understand and learn and try and sever, instead of allowing myself to just be.

What is Morality?--shaman sun

Ayn Rand might have us think that to be moral, you must first consider yourself. You, who are sitting here, reading this, allow all to be experienced. Without you, the individual, nothing else would be quite the way it is. The ability to love, laugh, think and create are in your powers—why would you seek to dismantle, or discredit this being? Point taken, and wonderfully written. However, the question persists, and as the battle of ideology and perspective rages on, what is morality, and what is it dependant upon?

We consider ourselves to be inherently ethical beings. It exists, but whether or not is fabricated, or whether or not it comes from a source outsideourselves is what is often debated. In the case of the New Atheists and the Christian Apologists, a few claims are made. These claims may both be missing critical pieces in their argument that bring us back to the start, once again.

The first claim is that of the Christian Apologist—Ethics are what steps us beyond the animal, and what gives us unique traits. Our capacity to love is other-worldly, and one that cannot be seen in other species. More specifically, it is a trait that cannot be seen even in other cultures that do not stem from Christianity. Our ability to choose love is our gift, and our ultimate responsibility.

Aside from a number of biased arguments—that compassion does not exist strongly on other religions and cultures, and that it does not exist in nature, this worldview requires a belief in the super natural. Case in point, it actually asks a lot of the convert to consider. It asks, in fact, of a whole other world, a world of supernatural, holy nature, to exist in order for it to be true. The ability to define, prove and otherwise accurately understand this other-worldliness has yet to be shown. To add the old argument of Occams Razor—the simpler the cause, the more likely it is true. This may not give us a sound argument, but it adds to the probability that to attach an entire metaphysical world to a view of ourselves may not be necessary for ethics, and compassion to exist.

The other arguments, that compassion does not exist strongly in other religion, and that it does not exist in nature, are both wildly inaccurate. If one is familiar with the Buddhist schools, Mahayana is the “vehicle” of the Buddha, which is love. The ultimate reality of the universe is love itself, which is Buddha-nature. Good works, works of compassion enable the practitioner to step beyond himself and slowly dissolve the ego. “Karma” by any sense is action, and not necessarily ethical punishment. To a Buddhist, good or bad karma is really a matter of how much of a boundary you put up around yourself- how much suffering you inflict on others, and how much you feel that suffering. To open up, to purify karma is to dissolve the ego boundary over the lifetimes, ultimately being able to love unconditionally and see the universe as one, non-conceptually. This may appear grandiose, and it very well may be, but it is another take on ethics, and a prime example of love existing far beyond the limits of the Judeo-Christian culture.

Does compassion exist in nature? Can an animal be ethical? Well, there is plenty of evidence for the behavior of compassion, that is, for compassionate action. Nature is not so brutal as to turn a cold cheek to all forms of nurturing. In fact, without some co-existence, the entire eco system would collapse. From an biological point of view, nature is trying to survive, but a species cannot survive without the help of its environment-including other species. Daniel Quinn, other of "The Story of B" and "Ishmael" describes it as the "Law of Limited Competition." This means that no species necessarily dominates over another, not to an extreme. When it does, it throws off the delicate balance of the ecosystem, and the whole system collapses. One could see nature as a continual reharmonization according to environmental and genetic changes. Harmony is key, balance is vital. It is not, as the traditional view portrays, violent and merciless. So, seeing nature as harmonic to this extent, are we surprised that our species has the capacity to be harmonic? Are we shocked that we are able to care for one another, just as the wolf does for her cubs? I will leave this point at that question.

To move on to the New Atheists, they often enough do not go with this naturalistic argument. Instead, they tend to go to some “innate sense” that humans have that provides them ethics. What is this sense? If they are referring to the naturalistic argument, that of nurture and compassion being a very part of nature, then this makes sense. Yet, they often do not refer to it. It remains a hazy, roughly undefined description of our “human ethics” our innate value system, or something to that extent. It would be much appreciative if the New Atheists cultivated the vast data to reveal that nature is nurture, as much as it is violent. Instead, it seems that the New Atheists often call upon the classical and traditional argument for ethics—that of a reasonable one. Kant’s “categorical imperative” come to mind here, the highly abstract system of ethics, of deciding what is right. Without diving deeply into this, it can simply be said that to be ethical mustn’t require a high degree of conceptual skills. It may include that, for sure, but it may not necessitate it.

Instead, what if there are varying levels of ethical development? What if the harmonized, intricate balance of nature is our primordial ethical soup? One in which we emerge from, and cultivate our own artificial reflections of that balance, slowly, surely understanding the harmony from whence we came? Then, there may be a gradual emergence of ethics, one where ethics are cultivated over time. We have a biological urge to care- for sure. A mother and her newborn are one example. These are not “ultimate” facts in that they are sometimes untrue. Child abuse, violence, murder and countless “unethical” behavior also exist. Yet we are still compassionate, no matter what society we come from, no matter what age, there is care involved. What does this say of us? That is at least a part of our nature. Biologically, we are programmed to have compassion, relationship. We are also violent and territorial. Our nifty development, the intellect, is by far a curious emergence. It has allowed us to use reason to make decisions, to conceptualize our environment, and even be self-aware. Our self-awareness may have a direct influence on our ethics.

The second emergence may be a familial sense of ethics- next of kin. We are close to our family and friends. This can be likened to an “ethnocentric” view. Be nice to you, if you’re one of us. A “worldcentric” view develops according to exposure to other cultures, people and places, as well as our own cognitive development. How self aware are we? Do we see how we set up boundaries to separate ourselves from others, and thus feel protective of our walls, and violent towards outsiders? This stripping of the boundary is indicative of higher levels of ethics—ones that the Bodhisattvas speak of, and even of the ethics the New Atheists care for: stripping away of our cultural conditions to see underlying connections. This is the vital link that creates an ethical society. All in all, we can see an emergence of ethics as that of something that goes beyond God vs. Godless—it is an inherently complex nature, in which some parts are born of genetics, biology and environment. Others are due to culture, both artificial and natural recognition of others in relation to the individual. Ethics is a part of a greater, grander development of the mind, of the heart, of the human being—who is always and increasingly growing and evolving. These days, that evolution is a cultural, psychological one. It is one of increasing complexity—the question is, can we see it that way, or must we see it so dualistically?

Rethinking Ethics, Society and the New Tomorrow-- shaman sun

As we spiral deeper and deeper into the information age, the singularity appears to draw near. We can get vast amounts of information at the push of a button—In fact, if we wanted to, we could download vast libraries of books, media and other forms of both entertainment and education. The internet, above all new advancements in technology, has created a decentralized culture of vibrant networks, oscillating and thriving, constantly shifting and flowing through the minds of its users. We have created a massive brain, in a sense, of knowledge and entertainment, culture and science. That, and literally anything else you could think of. In doing so, the internet as inadvertently shaped the mindset of the next generation (X, Y and so forth)—one that does not necessarily buy into the centralized, bureaucratic system we currently have in place. People are thinking differently. The rise of “open source” and collaboration have not only created breathing online societies, but also active groups in the real world. Networking websites (Meetup.com, for instance) have helped get people to do things and come together. In short, this is what Manuel Delanda has described as, “The Rise of Network Societies.” Its key traits are: decentralized power, network structure and collaboration.

As the old ways of doing things face the new way, we will see, and have seen some major shifts in power. The internet community, for example, has permanently crippled the media industry. The use of file sharing spreads like wildfire, and the hierarchical business structures attempting to combat it continue to lose legal battle after legal battle in the world. Attempts by lobbyists to limit the internet into “packages” like cable, or satellite T.V. have received fierce threats by Google, who, threatened in turn to broadcast the internet free from its orbiting satellites. These are only a few of the examples, and each is giving a powerful example of the network society. If communities and businesses continue to organize in this way, what can we expect? For starters, greater collaboration, integration of technology and activism. There will be institutions, but their purpose will be to simply keep the network growing, thriving. Those who can “hyper link” will be the greatest in standing. The most dynamic, adaptable will begin to win out in competition. Big business, though still existent, will be melted into vast frameworks of smaller business, all needing each other to co-exist, all of them co-dependent. Imagine, if you will, a brain. It is nearly infinitely complex, networked, yet still existing within it are general faculties with specific purposes. If all of this is abstract to you, you’re not alone. We can only imagine and speculate at this point, but speculation can certainly help us see what is happening now. We can ask ourselves—what are the important patterns now? And how are they going to be beneficial?

For starters, a network is by far more adaptable to challenges in its very structure. It has the whole of a community ready and willing to face a problem, and not simply one bureaucratic pyramid. If societies evolve, then this structure is the latest and the greatest in adaptation.
How will this new framework affect us culturally? How will we grasp both our morality and our ethics in such an ever-changing society? Or in Descartes words, where will we place our feet on firm ground? Take to mind the image of a sailboat. It has no “firm” grounding, yet it is a mastery of the wind and the sea—and ever changing, ever flowing ocean of air and water. Our grounding will not be so crystallized, but more liquefied. Our knowledge will rest on the ebb and flow of knowledge, network and flowing powers. If the information age has created a sea of knowledge, we must learn to sail upon it.

In this case, we must learn the nature of water, wind and the mastery of information exchange. We must become both sailors and swimmers, fliers in a world where there is no firm grounding anymore—and perhaps we are better off this way. Our fundamental attitudes on things may change, indeed, our very thinking structures may be affected by such a life at sea. We may find ourselves observing the flow between not only networks, but people and their ideas:The flow of perspectives, and their natural development. There may be a natural shift from seeing things in a classical, orderly way (That of modernity), to a balance of both chaos and harmony. Greater patterns emerge, and they may emerge in thinking, in ways that both the modernist and the postmodernist could not easily imagine. Religion, ethics and society itself may find a greater unity in the dynamic flex and flow of perspective. Surface features may become less important, as deeper currents are discovered. We may witness, as we are now, a reemergence of perennial philosophy, and collaborative religions! Imagine that! Protestants, Catholics and Buddhists working together, discovering underlying beliefs and ways to connect.

There are already movements to do see integral perspectives; some are successful, others merely collapse one into another, still others crystallize into frozen maps of the universe. What we cannot expect is a unified theory of everything—What we can expect is the ability to step beyond individual perspective and see the bigger picture, and act accordingly. In short, we are witnessing the birth of a society that no longer requires set boundaries. We are stepping out of our shells, and in doing so are seeing ourselves in a greater, deeper picture than ever before.

Some may turn away from this dramatic shift, and that is to be expected. With the coming of any new age, there are always those who wish to return to the old ways. This is actually quite understandable. Change is terrifying, and uncertain. For the most part, it seems downright dangerous. Yet, this new way of thinking may very well change us for the good—it may help us see that fear is something that must be released and relaxed, in order for growth to occur.

-shaman sun

Creativity

When you tap into creativity, coffee and cigs become your life blood.
You keep nutrigrain bars and cereal boxes nearby to fend off the caffeine jitters.
It's the one time you hate that you cant smoke in your apartment.

You have a special set of songs on your playlist for just such moments.
You find a song that strikes a chord with your creativity, set it to loop.
You never touch those songs when you're feeling normal. They're sacred.

Your bowels tremble from your surge in poor diet.
Using the bathroom is an inconvenience, an unwelcome intermission.
You hold it as long as you can, to ensure you dont lose your existentialism.

The TV is on, set to a channel you dont pay any attention.
The voices and flicker of light keep you grounded to reality.
The curtains are closed and only a dim light illuminates the room.

The graphite smudges as you furiously place your hand all over your drawing.
The drawing becomes something different than what it started out to be.
An evolution of consciousness and being, reflected on paper.

You lost count of how many cigs were left half a pack ago.
The wind blows your hair as you smoke your cigarette slowly.
You have every thought and no thought, only an urge to get back into your apartment, your sanctuary.

You pick a new song on your playlist, but it only distracts you.
It isnt helping you to tap into the vein of consciousness streaming from mind to hand to paper.
A moment later you go back to the previous song. Relaxation. It's perfectly you.

What sparked this streak? Your dreams the previous night?
Maybe it was styling your hair differently, maybe it was because you finally had a day off.
In the end, you are entranced.

The picture nearly complete. You cant start something new.
You keep fixing the drawing, making it perfect, so you can stay in your thoughts.
Too many smudges on the picture. Erasing those will keep you in No Mind a few minutes longer.

Something entrances you about the instant coffee string hanging from your cup.
Another sip, and you miss, spilling it all over your tattered jeans. Maybe it was your jeans that sparked this feeling.
It's heresy to the creativity gods, but you dont allow it to effect you. Stay focused, dont let the hot coffee against your leg take you from this perfection. No Gods, no masters.

Suddenly, a memory. You had a bike stolen, in another life. A dream life.
Why the hell would you need a bike? Unfortunately that thought hadnt occurred to you in the dream.
You strive for lucidity while asleep, but its unattainable, a breeze on your cig's hot ember.

Bend like bamboo. Become a river. Flex/flow.
These alien concepts, are now being directly experienced.
Turn states into traits.

The previous show ends, another begins.
Sad, I wish I had followed the Soprano's while it was still on.
A rerun you've never seen, and arent paying enough attention to enjoy.
Note to self, torrent all Soprano's seasons.

Another cig. Your downstairs neighbor walks by, smiling at you.
A fake smile returned. Fuck 'em, they're a distraction. Come back when you're feeling creative, cause you're fucking up my chi.

The house is too messy, you should really clean it.
Not now, im busy discovering Oneness.
National Geographic channel yearning for me to care about starving children.
Maybe later. I'm too busy malnourishing myself. Yeah, $5 a day aint much to most, but thats a pack of cigs you wont have the cash to smoke.

A text message, and a phone call, both ignored. I'm busy.
Adding a poster and a man prying open his third eye to the drawing. Buddhist chants on the wall.
Maybe this is a dream, and I am finally lucid dreaming. I wont test it to find out. I'm busy.

You forgot deodorant this morning, and the summer heat is reminding you of your need for it.
Your lip curls as you erase another mistake. No time for mistakes. Your moustache reeks. Did you brush your teeth?
Another trip to the bathroom. Not enough arms to piss, brush your teeth, and put on antiperspirant. Dont wanna hit the seat. Wiping it off would waste time. No time for mistakes.

Minty breath subsides quickly with the constant gulps of coffee.
A minute and thirty seconds for another cup. Makes you wish you had a coffee pot instead of these instant singles.
It gives you just enough time to get grounded to reality.

Good thing you showered earlier. No time for a cleansing rain.
Typing on your keyboard. Graphite under your gnarled fingernails.
You wanna change the song so badly, strike another vein of consciousness, start another picture.
A blog will suffice for now. The hollywood theme from a vampire first-person shooter. It cradles you, and entrances you. Everything and nothing. No Mind, and Every Mind. IBS flaring up. Gotta hold it, keep grounded to the existential, the infinite, the universal...

Morality and the New Atheists' Need To Act

Alright, that's it. I am tired of this goddamned discussion of morality. It's all horse shit and here's why.

The Christians say that morality and our sense of right and wrong comes from the Ten Commandments and then later the Bible. So, all pre-biblical people were fucked and spent their leisure time raping, stealing and murdering everyone all the time because they had no moral code?
No. It's a bullshit statement, so stop making it people!!!

The New Atheists all say, essentially, that we have just a sense of what is right and what is wrong. Some even say its just a "feeling". What the fuck is the difference between that and the "feeling" or "sense" that there's a God???? There is no difference, and these bastards who are supposed to be the figurehead of non-theist representation in govenment worldwide are making the same goddamned arguments the people they are fighting are.
Fire against fire doesnt work. So quit that shit.

Instead, when it comes to morals, don't point to books, scriptures, or theology. Point at a fucking eagle. Point at a snake. Point at some bears. Point at some bees.

According to the bible, the Earth was made for Man and Man was made to rule it. We were given a moral code. A set of rules to follow. Why is it that nobody brings in animals as the discussion's point??? Especially evolutionists! We come from animals, the people you are arguing against know this, why not use animals as your argument.

The fucking animals arent raping, killing, stealing, murdering each other. Yes animals do kill. Yes animals do rape. But not all animals do that, and in fact the majority of the animal kingdom only kills for food or in defense, only rapes to propogate its species, and only steals to survive. Again, this is not a constant thing in the animal kingdom, but that doesnt mean that its non-existent.

We need to start asking the Christians "Okay, well, without the 10 Commandments and the Bible, why are the animals not just wiping each other out? Why are they not destroying us? Or has God given them a sense of morality too? And if the animals have a sense of morality that arent written down, or taught to each animal, then why do we, as descendants of these animals, need it written down to???"

Why is THIS not brought up? EVER! It would allow the atheists to further prove that we have the same sense of well being as a group and an individual that animals do. However, this leaves the Christians having to figure out why. And if the simple answer is "well we didnt come from animals" then why arent the animals destroying us? or each other? why has no one species of animal obliterated another species and continued a path of destruction? "well God wouldnt allow that" well then, did God give the animals a sense of morality too? or does he just not allow any inter-species annihilation or any large-scale attack on the humans? and if he gave the animals a sense of morality, and they are less intelligent than ourselves, and can clearly grasp this sense of morality, then why did he leave us devoid of morality until Moses came along? did we not need it written down for us before then because we were nutty fucking savages? and if we had a sense of morality before Moses and the 10 Commandments, then what is the fucking point of the 10 Commandments and the Bible if we already had a pretty fucking good moral compass before Moses?

All I want to know is, why the FUCK this isnt the goddamned topic for debate when it comes to morality, instead the figureheads of the Non-theist movement default to saying we just have a "conscience" or a "feeling" of good and bad. Quit flaking on us guys, you are making yourselves look like hypocrites, and you are making the non-theist movement look like a fad. Organize together, have a discussion, and decide what your fucking answers are going to be AS A GROUP. Otherwise you are acting as splinter-cells and lose the look of a united front of a united cause.

You must describe, with science, morality. Do this.
You must describe transcendental states and 'peak experiences' in non-theological ways so that when people have such moments in their life, they don't turn to religion because it's the only thing that explains what their experiences are. Do this.
And you must stop fucking DEBATING everyone. These debates are not furthering the cause, but boosting your egos. Instead, grab a shitton of people to march on Washington or Parliament and demand representation. Organize sit-ins. Protests. Don't just throw money at funds and then retire to inflating your ego with another religious debate. FUCKING DOOOO SOMETHING! Get commercials on TV. Billboards. Protest sit-ins infront of churches. Demand that the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster recieve tax-breaks for all its members or the government is descriminating against their religious beliefs. SHOW THEM HOW FUCKING RETARDED THEY ARE AND HOW WE WILL NOT STAND FOR IT ANYMORE!!!

Do something. Selling books and t-shirts, and giving debates were all well and good to begin with, because it spread awareness about the cause. That's over. People know we are here. They know how numerous we are. But we are doing NOTHING to stop it. Lets quit doing more of the same by making youtube videos for us all to enjoy mocking the religious.

A great way to get shit done is to GET HOLLYWOOD BEHIND YOU! I fucking guarantee that there are people in hollywood who are nontheists who would love to march on Washington. This will bring even more people to help our cause.

Get together. Write a set of things out that needs changing. You are tilting at windmills if you think that you will eradicate all religion. No, the best thing you can do is start at getting equality and representation in government and then wait and cross your fingers that most prominent and supernatural-based religion will go away. There will always be crazy Scientologists and Haley's Commet cults getting some people's attention. It happens, and will never disappear.

So, stop debating and stop writing books, and stop putting and asking for money into secular funds. Raise money for EVENTS. Sit-ins. Protests. And to get people to washington to make themselves known. Imagine if you put a campaign together as big as Martin Luther King Jr. and every bit of funding you recieve went to plane tickets for people around the USA to fly to DC and protest and march on Washington.

If not, you are just wasting everyones time and hope that you will actually help to get anything done. It's time to get some shit done. To give explainations for ALL ASPECTS of life so that people who dont want to turn to religion, can get logical, and fact-based answers. No more "'god did it", let's be honest and not afraid to shrug our shoulders and say "we dunno yet". All of science is a fucking guessing game. THATS THE POINT! Why are we afraid to admit it? THATS WHAT SEPARATES US FROM RELIGION. IN THE FACE OF OPPOSITION OR A QUESTION WE CANNOT ANSWER WE CLAIM THAT WE JUST DONT KNOW, INSTEAD OF GIVING BULLSHIT DOGMA! Be proud of not knowing! It's what makes you ask questions in the first place. It's what separates you from just taking any shovel of shit any religion tries to feed you and accepting it. YOU ARE OKAY NOT KNOWING! THATS WHAT MAKES YOU AN ATHEIST/AGNOSTIC AND NOT A CHRISTIAN/MUSLIM/CATHOLIC.

I hope that somewhere on the internet, this gets seen by many people, and I hope that others can agree. Please, let me know if you are a non-theist of any kind and agree with what I've said here. And, please, if some religious nut starts quoting the bible, or ranting about the inaccuracy of this blog in the comments section, just don't give them the common decency of your time, patience, thought or emotion to respond to them. I will simply remove their comment, and we can try and keep to productive conversation here.